Friday, November 14, 2008

At First

Dating - Some would define it as an exciting period of time when you embark on a little journey with a potential mate. Everything is new and exciting because that person is, well, new. To me, dating is more an inevitable task on par with going to the dentist. You squirm and hem and haw and silently hope that some freak of nature causes an F3 tornado to bypass Moore, Oklahoma and somehow rip through Uptown Dallas, therefore cancelling said appointment. But since the skies are clear, you end up going and realize that it wasn't as painful as you made it out to be. And if nothing else, you end up walking out with shiny teeth. (Umm...what were we talking about?)

I have a newly formed opinion that it takes many, many adult years to become fully formed in all areas of your adult life. Some choose to move up the corporate ladder quickly and efficiently and while possessing a limitless knowledge of the business world, little attention has been paid to social development. *ahem* Others play the field and end up being masters of the dating world, or do so and find that the married life is for them. Either way, they've explored and figured out their place in the rat race of love.

I am the first to admit that I am behind the times when it comes to dating. Read: real adult dating and relationships. They frighten me. And adding to that is a new confusion.

I recently started dating B. You could say that this is my very first foray into the normal dating world. Nothing about Mr. M and I was normal; not the way we met, not how we dated or felt about each other, nothing. So the best way to describe my current feelings about B (after 1 1/2 dates and 2 make out sessions,) is...bemusement. There's some also some intrigue thrown in for good measure but the main ingredient is head-scratching confusion. Is it supposed to be like this? I find myself wondering. Aren't you supposed to feel giddy and excited and have butterflies and the whole nine? Or is that just cliche and do regular people in the real world actually grow to like one another? Or is the absence of butterflies an omen that the coupling is doomed?

I ask you my doves, what is "normal" when it comes to dating?


harmoni said...

As Leo the Lop once said, "Normal is whatever you are." :D The ultimate goal of dating is to see if you would like to spend the rest of your life with said person. But, meanwhile, back at the ranch - dating can just be fun, or keep you from sitting home alone. Sit back and enjoy the ride!

MrsCNLee said...

I think Mom's right, to an extent. Dating is useful for teaching you what you like, and dont like, about the other sex. But adult relationships are NOT all butterflies and roses and they really do take work and compromise and intentional growth twords one another. Of course there are deal breakers, and you should know what yours are, up front. But if a long term relationship is your goal, be prepared for some work. However, if just playing the field is your goal, then go with whatever is fun at the moment as long as you dont run over someone else's feelings along the way.